A.N.G.A.U

Angau.
Aku rasa semua manusia dalam dunia ni pernah mengalami penyakit angau ni.
Yes, even Ustaz, Ustazah, or whoever!

Even aku pun ( derr kalo ustazah pun boleh experience, aku lagi lah!)

First of all, let me explain the definition of Angau.
To me, its like a disease yg sangat2 bahaya. Angau yg berlebihan akan membantutkan tumbesaran spiritual dan mentally.
Ia adalah tentang ketaksuban or kecintaan terhadap manusia yg berlebihan.

Ok. now that I have define the definition of Angau (according to my dictionary of life experience) I wanna share my story.

As any usual weak human being, I had this virus before in me.
It was terribleeeee I tell you.
Almost every single moment I will think about it..what should I do..what's the SOLUTION? when?how?
Sampai I felt that my brain was tired, exhausted just thinking about it.
Don't get me wrong,I did not want to think about it. I was in a state where I wish I had temporary mind lost disorder so that I could at least forget about him.
But AlhamduLilah, I was still in a state where I could manage my feeling, I did not tell people around on the social network about him. Rather, I kept myself in silence for a while. pfft.
I hate it. I hate it when I angau.

BUT. You know what, Allah says:

"Hai manusia, tenangkanlah dirimu, sesungguhnya kalian bukannya berdoa pd yg tuli dan tidak pula kepada yg gaib tetapi kalian sedang berdoa kepada Tuhan yang Maha Mendengar lg Maha dekat. Dia selalu bersama kalian.(Riwayat Bukhari dan Muslim melalui Abu Musa r.a)"

I cried. I prayed.

I cried because I was aware that that feeling actually astray me from thinking of my Lord.
I cried, because I felt that my daily life was not normal anymore.
I cried, because I felt that I was tied to an invisible rope.. I lost that freedom. For one to gain happiness one needs to get herself free from fear.

So there I was, living in angau.

However, AlhamduLilah..berkat aku berdoa dan guide from dear friends..I managed to concurred myself back!

Firstly, we MUST NOT give up in doa. DOA DOA DOA..pray!pray!pray! Cry to Allah, tell Him everything (even when He already knows), Beg Him! Beg Him for His help and guidance because He has promise to help us in whatever circumstance and because Allah is with us all the time.

Secondly, get the right people to advice. AlhamduLilah I have been rewarded with such lovely, dearly friends whom never fail to touch my heart even when their statement sentap me sometimes. But I believe, that's what I need. True friends sentap each other for good reasons. :)

Thirdly, make yourself busy busy busy! Go to the Facebook pages and look for events yang berunsur ilmiah dan fun. Always text your parents and friends when you are feeling lonely, ask them for any interesting event coming up. Have a good discussion on anything that can reminds us of Allah. Read books. Preferably books that will bring you closer to Allah.

Fourthly, we must think forward. If he is the one for me inshaaAllah I will be with him. But if he's not, then Allah knows best. Islam doesn't denies our nature to love and care, but true love is the one that will make you happy and CLOSER to ALLAH swt.

" Jodoh tak pasti, Mati itu pasti"-Hilal Asyraf

 ..Semoga kita dalam kalangan yg sentiasa mengingati kematian sesungguhnya kematian itu PASTI..